BarView – Drinking at Home

You Can’t Get a DUI When You’re Drinking at Home By Kate Serpa Photos by Philip Johnson

Phil and I did something different this month. We decided to stay in to create cocktails you can take out. It is a fact that I love going out to local bars and trying the new and exciting, but sometimes its nice to not wear shoes (or pants) and not have to drive, you know? Plus with this July sun/heat/death thing going on, my pale skin and I do better with not going outside in general. Now for those of you who are the tan-type and can venture outdoors without getting fried (I hate you), the following are excellent to take to barbeques/MoBand outings/pool parties…. or whatever you and your fellow non-Irish-skinned people do outside in the summer. You jerks.

So, I’ve recently started making my own limoncello — probably one of the best and worst things I could be doing in my spare time. Although I’m being crafty and know what I’m giving everyone for Christmas, I now have access to 151 proof grain alcohol that tastes like magic. The one thing about limoncello is that you do have to wait a bit before you can drink it. The waiting is, obviously, the hardest part; so it’s best to make a lot of batches that way you have subsequent amounts to ease the time burden. Also, limoncello should be shared. No one needs that entire bottle to themselves, and won’t you look like the most sophisticated person on the block when you show up to that barbeque full of people you don’t like with a personally crafted bottle of get-drunk-delicious.

Getting your five daily servings of fruit gets a whole lot easier when you add whiskey. (This approach, however, does not work in the same sense with vegetables.) And so I present to you my amazing peach whiskey sours (applause), which are good and good for you. Unlike limoncello, there is zero wait time with this one, and you can feel like a healthy, reasonable adult because you’re getting your five servings.

Limoncello Recipe Ingredients: 1 bottle Everclear Grain Alcohol, 14 lemons, 2 cups water, 2 cups sugar Week One: Carefully remove the yellow skin with a vegetable peeler (graters make it too hard to separate the peel from the finished product). Be careful not to get ANY of the white pith on the peel, because it will turn out just as bitter as you’ll be with yourself for ruining your batch. Put the peels and the entire bottle of Everclear in a glass container with an airtight lid. Hide your jar in a cool dark place where you won’t be tempted to open it. Wait a super long week. Week two: Combine your sugar and water in a saucepan and heat until the sugar is completely dissolved. Add the simple syrup to your batch and stir. Put the jar back in your hiding place and wait another super long week. Week Three: Open and enjoy. My favorite limoncello cocktail (pictured) is a big splash limoncello, a reasonable splash of heavy whipping cream, and mineral water poured over ice and stirred… so damn good.

Peach Whiskey Sours -Puree 2 skinned fresh peaches (I got mine from Loretelli’s). Pour in a shaker. -Add in 2 shots of Jameson for each drink. Add lemon juice and simple syrup. Shake and pour over ice. And most importantly, enjoy.

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About the Author:

Kate Serpa does not live in Modesto, CA, nor does she attend court-reporting school. She has not played for the piano for a number of years and she is definitely not excited about helping out at the McHenry Museum. She detests drinking, bar hopping, and late night adventures, and thinks girls who dye their hair red are disgraceful. She has absolutely zero sense of humor and is boring as hell.